I can’t shake the feeling that I am running out of time. I am beginning to think that this is a feeling that can’t be shaken. Can you run out of something that cannot be counted? Knowing how many of something you have doesn’t tell you much if each thing is a different size….I could tell you I have 11 containers of water but if one is the size of a barge and one is the size of a thimble where does that leave you? Can you run out if you don’t know how much you have because you don’t actually ~have~ it at all?
Messages arrived to jostle my relationship to time this week. The way that attention and preoccupation can guide us is funny (uncanny….miraculous?)
Mandy Brown writes, “something else I want to suggest here, and it’s to stop thinking about time entirely. Or, at least, to stop thinking about time as something consistent……Energy makes time.”
Josh Schrei declares, “Time, beloved time, is the ultimate support. Time is not a burden. Time is a great support. Imagine a culture that has turned time into a burden, a scarce commodity, a resource that everyone never seems to have enough of. Our relationship to time in the modern world is weighing us down, gnawing at us, eating us alive because we’ve taken something that carries us and pretended that we carry it. Time is here to support us. It’s not an enemy, something we fight against, something that’s running out. It’s only a burden if we’ve quantified and compartmentalized a particular vision of it and then enslaved ourselves to that vision. But the ultimate support for us is all that this works itself out in time.”
Imagine!
Time passes, lurches, continues without us doing a thing at all. We don’t even need to paddle. Perhaps the trouble comes from all the resistance, all the fighting. This reminds me that when one of my best friends was born, her parents sent a birth announcement with a heading that said ‘welcome to the continuum’ which is both very glamorous and very apt.
It’s still Wednesday, right?
nyc bulletin:
- Trans Art Jest - comedy show May 16th at 8pm (part of Trans Art Fest)
- Breath Door Show - June 5th - link coming soon, save the date plz