contronyms are words that also mean their opposite. there are dozens of them in the English language, i find them fascinating and jarring. here is a list for your perusal.
somehow they express the paradoxes of being alive, they scratch at the meanings i make of things, they poke holes, they let air in.
i learned a new one: bolt. i was feeling cagey, like i might want to bolt (from what in particular i don’t know), and someone reflected back to me that strong structures need bolts. to bolt is to run, to bolt is to bind.
there are so many contradictions like this in me.
this reminded me of the song breathe my name, one of its refrains (refrain - another contranym! to repeat, to not do something at all), is
you know my name
you don’t know my face
and it reminds me that so often what we call ourselves, each other, our experiences gets in the way of actually knowing ourselves, each other, our experiences, of actually being there. the flip side is how sometimes a new name brings us closer to it, to ourselves, to each other.
tricky business, together and against. sending you love from this flash of light.